Whooo! The admins are releasing HINTS! What an occasion! Well, not enough of an occasion to put on pants, but at this point I’m not sure anything is…

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The 15th is coming up fast, and you know what that means: hints! Well, it doesn’t always mean hints, because sometimes we’re too lazy to come up with hints, but often it means hints. This month, it means hints. So here are some hints.

Hey! Wait! Maybe you have no idea what I’m talking about. Let’s fill you in: every month, Gaia sells special limited-edition items called Monthly Collectibles. The items are revealed on the 15th of every month; before the 15th, everyone makes thousands of wild, absurd guesses about what the items might be. In order to tease and infuriate you, we release some really vague hints… and here they are!

• Lingering, belaboring, beating a dead horse… it’s never sounded so sweet!
• Don’t be surprised if you see me acting a little weird. I’m just a dude whose circumstances are beyond his control, you know? Thanks.
• Eric Stoltz had that big ol’ face, but Cher still loved him (and so did we).
• An amusement enjoyed by butlers, squires, and pages alike. A fine fit for all man.
• Overalls are never a good fashion choice. Be especially wary when they change colors.
• Fear the wrath of the cod horn.
• d**k Cheney, in some ways, is kind of like Darth Vader. That’s not a political statement, so don’t get offended.

So there are your hints. Tough ones, too! Get to guessin’, Gaians.

To learn more about Monthly Collectibles, ease your web browser into this crevice.